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Sunday, September 14, 2014

My take on TIW 82 :-)

Someone had the idea of changing their 'tagwords' on KDP Amazon to match the famous writer their work is close to...so I added Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett...they didn't allow me to put Dan Brown...too many misleading hits, apparently...I think the Brown Mafia have something to do with it. Let's see what that does....

And yes, here's my version of TIW Challenge 82, another 'marital strife' type dialogue
...if you haven't voted for my story in Challenge 81, please do so...it's the solemn funny one....
http://theironwriter.com/challenge-81/

The Brother

TIW Challenge 82

(4 elements - A Arnold Schwarzenegger Commando Action Figure, A New (10th) Circle of Hell (meaning you have to make it up and give it a title), The Dunning Kruger Effect, Perfume Atomizer)

She came in, spraying her perfume atomizer around the room. Someone was coming round. Who was it?
"I've told you a thousand times, my work doesn't smell." I sealed the box up and put my collection of Amblytelus ground beetles away into their particular drawer.
"I don't care. I hate those things. Smell or no smell, I think they're disgusting."
"It's my work, dear, my field of expertise." To make her feel more at ease, I opened the window to let some fresh air in.
"My brother will be here soon, so take those joggy bottoms of yours off and put on something more…respectable."
"Your brother? But that's the second time this month? What does he want now? More money?" I checked my wallet, making sure there was enough to cover such a visit.
"Brian! How dare you! He's my brother. If he needs money, then we can help him out."
"Why doesn't he get a job?"
"Brian!" She rushed across the room, spraying her perfume atomizer along the furniture and the sofa, only to find her supply running out.
"Well, he thinks he knows everything!"
"You know he's unskilled…"
"Yes, but he's always ready to tell me what's right and what's wrong, isn't he? It's those muscles of his, it makes him think he's some kind of superhero who can do anything. I'm sure he suffers from the Dunning Kruger Effect…"
"He's my brother, you can't talk about him like that! And anyway, there's nothing wrong with a little muscle…"
I watched as she left the room and emerged with a plate load of sandwiches from the kitchen.
"A little muscle? He's got more muscles than a caterpillar!" That last remark caused her to stop in her tracks and tutt.
"Ah, I knew you'd have to bring your Entomology into this at some point. You just can't stop thinking about it, can you? My brother takes care of his body and as I said, there's nothing wrong with his muscles."
"Absolutely. Every day, 8 to 4, in that gym. My old Arnold Schwarzenegger Commando action figure had less muscles than him. Except for one, of course." I tapped the side of my head and she shook hers.
"Well please don't go into some intellectual tirade like you did the last time. You know how upset he gets when he doesn't understand something. He broke grandma's China vase, remember? We're running out of the old inheritance."
"Yes, I remember. He's rather like a gorilla, don't you think? His dire apathy towards knowledge is killing. They should invent a whole new Circle of Hell just for him, 'Apathy of Knowledge and Understanding', perhaps. A little different to ignorance, wouldn't you say? Ignorance isn't really a choice for him, it would be a step up…that place would be good for a few other people I don't care to mention..."
She clenched her fists, pushing them down to her sides and her face went a deep purple.
"Don't bring my parents into this!"






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