The Revenant...SPOILERS...Hugh Glass? Yeah, right.

I heard 'The Revenant' was one of the best movies of the moment, so I watched it...I want that two and a half hours of my life back, thank you very much.
I'm reading "Mrs Dalloway" by Virgina Woolf at the moment...THAT is class. The Revenant is NOT.
DiCaprio's performance is the only good thing about this movie...oh, and the snow. Go and watch it for that, if you must, but it's his "man in a bid to survive" performance, one which he has so often done before. His face suits it.
So, what's wrong? The winter landscape shots are fantastic, you can feel the cold and immense distances. But there are problems with believability, as many critics have already said.
Firstly, how can someone survive so many things which would kill you? He escapes an Indian raid on their pelt camp (about 25 out of 35 people die), he survives THREE individual attacks from a large mother grizzly bear and then is crushed under its corpse, he survives his injuries, fevers, the cold weather conditions, loss of blood, hunger, infection, escapes from the Indians by floating downriver, survives lethal rapids, escapes with a horse from the open French camp, ANOTHER Indian attack on horseback, a lethal fall from a cliff where he falls through a large tree to land in the snow and finally overcomes the man who killed his son. What?! His name is Hugh Glass. Glass. Yeah, right. He never breaks. American irony, huh?
Secondly, what is this movie actually about? It's a story about a Pawnee chief trying to find his kidnapped daughter. His tribe are able to track down Glass' group through the wilderness BUT not realise that the French have her daughter? They meet them at least twice in the movie, surely one of the braves can 'smell' or 'see' her? And they don't trust them, so why don't they check the French out? All they know is that two white men came and took the daughter. It could easily have been the French as well as the Americans.
Thirdly, just when you think, okay, that was a movie, nice scenery, shame about the plot hole and unbelievability, but good acting by DiCaprio with a spiritual ride back to his dead family...no, hang on, what's that? He breaks the 4th wall in the last 10 seconds? There he is, looking straight at the camera. Hello, DiCaprio, how much did you get for this one?
Really, I wanted to like it...